Finding Zen Between the Chaos: A Mother’s Journey to Presence and New Beginnings

Life as a mom is a whirlwind—an endless stream of responsibilities, to-do lists, and the frantic pace of managing so many moving parts at once. From early mornings to late nights, from homework help to meal preparation, the rhythm rarely slows. It’s a beautiful, demanding, exhausting role that shapes who I am every day. Yet amid the chaos, I have learned that life doesn’t need to be perfect or still to be Zen. Zen is found in the small moments—the breath taken between tasks, the unexpected smiles, the quiet beach walks with friends and Sam, the sweet black lab I’ve come to know this summer while caring for my good friend Kirstin Boncher’s dog.

The Push and Pull of Motherhood and Mindfulness

Motherhood has formed the core of my identity and achievements, and there is no denying the power and pride in what that entails. But there is also a constant tension between the busyness of being “on” and the desire to simply be present. The endless list of to-dos can pull us in every direction, leaving little space for reflection or calm. Yet out of this very life of motion, I have found glimpses of Zen—not as a distant ideal, but as a practice woven into everyday moments.

Moving from the frenetic pace of mom life to something softer and more mindful hasn’t been about stepping away from responsibility, but about embracing a fuller sense of presence within it. It’s about welcoming newness—whether friends, ideas, or unexpected joys—and allowing these to refresh and expand my world. This shift was gently encouraged by my experience working recently at Urban Zen in Sag Harbor, a space that reflects mindfulness and soulful connection in every detail.

Embracing New Rhythms in Sag Harbor

My life at Urban Zen Sag Harbor has just started, but I’ve already begun to see how wellness, purpose, and mindfulness are truly lived here. The culture encourages finding balance in the everyday, inviting everyone to connect with intention and presence both at work and beyond.

The location itself—a calm, inviting place set within the changing seasons and natural beauty of the Hamptons—offered a peaceful contrast to daily demands. Here, I witnessed a culture of intention and balance, where work and well-being coexist, and everyone is encouraged to find their center amid the ebb and flow of life.

This was made even sweeter through the companionship of Sam, Kirstin’s affectionate black lab, whose easy presence was a comforting reminder that life’s simple pleasures are often the richest.

The Power of Small Moments

Finding Zen in motherhood means embracing the reality that life will always be busy and full. It doesn’t require perfection or silence, only the willingness to notice and honor moments of stillness wherever they appear. A shared laugh with a friend, a pause to breathe while watching the waves, a gentle walk on the beach—these moments become pockets of peace that sustain and energize.

This practice has reshaped how I approach everything—from managing a household to consulting with clients. It’s not about escaping the frantic pace but finding the calm within it, letting presence be the deepest thread weaving through the chaos.

Growth, Friendship, and Unexpected Joy

In this phase of life, I’ve come to value friendships and new connections more deeply than ever. They bring unexpected insights, laughter, and support. Urban Zen and the Sag Harbor community have illuminated how nourishing it is to be part of a collective that honors both hard work and heart-centered connection.

Motherhood taught me resilience and purpose; finding Zen has taught me to balance that power with gentleness and openness. Each day holds new experiences, and by staying present, even the unexpected becomes a source of discovery and growth.

Carrying Zen Forward

My journey continues with the intention to cultivate this balance, knowing that life’s energy will always pull in many directions. The key is not in controlling every moment but in welcoming what comes with a beginner’s mind: curiosity, acceptance, and grace.

Life doesn’t get less busy as time goes on, but with age comes the ability to find Zen within the chaos—to recognize the shared joy in everyday moments and the deep stillness at the close of a day. The feeling of a warm cup in hand, a quiet walk along the beach as the sun sets, or a few moments to simply breathe amidst the noise—these small rituals become anchors. Embracing this perspective allows a busy, beautiful life to be filled with meaning, calm, and gratitude—transforming survival into truly thriving.